Romantic relationships are a regular part of our writing because everyone loves love. Most stories have a romantic pairing even if it’s minor. I know I can’t resist hinting at a little bit of Snily action. For that reason, I decided to do some research and find out what things I should avoid when trying to write the best couple.
Avoiding Conflict and Tension
Conflict and tension are essential elements that move a story forward. They keep the reader gripped and interested. The use of tension and conflict helps the reader to get invested in the story, characters, and relationships.
We tend to love the conflict and tension that comes with a couple getting together, falling in love, the ups and downs of that process. The problem is that the story needs more than that. Two big mistakes regarding tension and conflict in romantic writing include:
- A writer not maintaining conflict and tension in other areas of the story—keeping all the tension with the romantic pairing.
- A writer not maintaining conflict and tension after the couple gets together.
For the first point, it’s essential to read your story and ensure that you have other elements than straight romance. There should be something more than love bringing your characters together and providing tension. Whatever element you choose can even be what brings them together. Even in a strictly romantic story, you should have subplots that aren’t romantic.
You should consider the genre that you are writing. If you are writing outside of romance, you need to ensure that you are paying close attention to the conflict outside of the romantic subplot.
The second point focuses on writing that has terrific build-up and a pivotal moment where the couple finally gets together. After the couple comes together, everything works out perfectly, and there’s no more tension. Without tension, there’s nothing driving the story since you have resolved everything. To continue the story, you need to keep conflict and tension in that relationship.
Let’s take a pairing that I know many people love as an example: Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy. We can all imagine the bickering and fighting that is involved in them getting together; how could there not be? Once they get together, would Draco stop rubbing her the wrong way? Would Hermione’s know-it-all attitude go away and stop grating on him? No. The characters would love and hate these qualities about each other. Draco and Hermione would have tension between them because of their differences; this creates the spark for the couple. Don’t take it away.
In real life, no relationship is perfect, and to keep the interest up, it should be the same in fiction. There can be difficulties between the couple and individually. One thing is certain; things can’t be plain sailing until you have resolved everything and written: ‘The End.’
Creating Stereotypical Characters
Romance novels and rom-com movies tend to have stereotypical characters. Predictable characters come across as cringe-worthy or two-dimensional. It can happen in any story, but it is more prominent in romance. Examples are the guy with a troubled past, the hard exterior with a soft heart, or maybe the pixie dream girl or characters with absolutely no flaws. The way we write characters, even in fanfiction, can make or break a story.
There are a few things that you can keep in mind when writing your characters. Firstly, craft and develop the characters individually. Suppose the character you are writing becomes one-dimensional, for example, focusing on obvious character traits such as Luna’s fascination with creatures that might not exist. They aren’t as believable on their own, or in their relationship.
To create an authentic character, you need to add flaws and make them more complex rather than only including their signature traits. Look at the motivations and focus on getting that character to resonate with your readers. When you focus only on the surface attributes, characters lack substance, which then causes the relationship to lack substance. Well-rounded characters form fully rounded and engaging relationships.
Love at First Sight
Instant attraction should not be confused with love at first sight. In real life, this doesn’t happen, and so it doesn’t ring true. There should never be an excuse for the use of instant love; even when using tropes such as ‘soulmate!AU’. It removes the conflict from the relationship, which removes satisfaction from the reader’s experience.
It erases the journey of the relationship since you’re already at the finish line. It eliminates the anticipation between the characters and from your readers. You have cut your story off from a significant source of conflict and tension, and it takes all the fun out of writing the relationship development and reading it.
What makes this most damaging is the lack of real, meaningful connection between the characters. This lack of connection prevents the reader from feeling for the characters and can cause them to eye-roll and move on.
Romanticising Harmful Dynamics
Relationships can be both positive and negative. Romantic relationships are no different. Your writing needs to be able to distinguish which of your romantic relationships are good and which are bad. Some relationships can be harmful, and it’s essential to show that.
How can you do that? By not romanticising the harmful attributes or relationships in your writing. They can aid conflict and tension, but don’t tell the reader that these are positive.
When you show negative actions as a symbol or expression of love, you are saying—intentionally or not—that these damaging actions are romantic and therefore positive. We often see this where a romantic lead has characteristics that are abusive verbally, emotionally, or even physically. You then show these attributes as sexy and desirable.
Characteristics to watch out for:
- Extreme jealousy.
- Possessiveness.
- Dominant and controlling.
- Obsessiveness.
It doesn’t mean that a character cannot display these traits, or that you cannot write about relationships that are controlling; however, it’s not romance if it’s abusive or toxic. When a reader chooses a romantic story, they are looking for certain things, and the dynamics in these relationships aren’t it. Use these traits to show your readers what’s healthy and what’s not.
Cliche Language and Descriptions
Romantic stories are full of clichés in the plot points, words used, and the way that we describe things. What makes a story great is its originality and the way it takes a reader by surprise. Clichés do not take us by surprise.
When I know what’s coming or I can predict a phrase, paragraph, or even plot point, I skim. Readers skimming is a sign that something is boring or expected, and it can cause the reader to miss important information. The reader should always be wholly engaged.
Clichés that are seen most commonly in romantic stories:
- Descriptions of eyes in excessive detail.
- Unoriginal ways of expressing emotions or feelings.
- Racing pulses.
- Lots of blushing.
- Long-drawn out gazes.
- Overused comparisons.
- To celestial bodies.
- To food.
- To flowers.
- Cliché phrases.
- You’re not like other girls.
- You don’t know how beautiful you are.
- Eyes raking over their body.
- Cliché plot points.
- Bad boy + good girl.
- Jealous ex.
- Love triangle.
- Word choices.
- Love.
- Passion.
- Desire.
You can avoid these pitfalls with a little thought and creativity. Think about the characters and what romance and emotion mean to them. If you feel the need to use a cliché, do it in a way that no one would expect and always try to incorporate the character into how you use them.
A brilliant example of using a cliché originally is in Fantastic Beasts when Newt Scamander refers to Tina’s eyes as being like a Salamander’s. The comparison Newt makes tells us a lot about him as a person as well as how he feels about Tina.
Think about the entire body and its language. The usual ways to show emotions are eyes and racing hearts and pulses, but what is the rest of the body doing? Think about what a character does with their hands, their posture. Communication comprises ninety-three per cent of non-verbal cues.
Far too often, we read stories where a character looks at their love and compares them to the sun, moon, stars, to the point where these comparisons to nature and celestial bodies have become a cliché. Employ fresh imagery and comparisons that matter to the characters or speak to them more profoundly. Think outside of what is obvious. Use unique words in ways that will surprise the reader.
Finally, simplicity is sometimes the most elegant way. Try to economise your words and use what moves the story forward and shows us how the character feels. Use streamlined descriptions that are far more effective and poignant than something long and poetic.
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